HANZKY

I found my old textbook from the health class to took a long time ago in john a logan. The book consists of a lot of useful things, it helps you in getting to know more about yourself, --from Love to Self-Responsibility to discovering your senses, your feeling, the way you think, what you think of sex, how well you communicate with others, how good you are in terms of expressing your feeling and so on and so forth-- that's why i didn't sell it back from the first place, i thought it would be worthwhile keeping it.


Anyway, so i was trying to answer the list of the questions in the book...i was feeling it..ready to explore the true me..=). But..hmm..considering it's kinda late right now..and time for me to hit the bed...maybe i'll save this for tomorrow. How about that?. Or should i do a few of those first and continue the rest tomorrow? Hmm, let's see...i have to wake up at 7.30 tomorrow, and now is half hour to midnite, that means if i sleep now..i'm gonna have 7 1/2 hours to sleep and that's just about enough, i usually required myself to get 8 hours sleep everyday *I am very adamant about my sleeping cycle* . So, can't do it now...have to sleep. nite nite...

I just got back like half an hour ago and i feel so exhausted..it's not like i had a lot to do..maybe i feel tired because i just haven't consumed the food i need for today. I had my usual frozen food for lunch this afternoon, but turned out that it didn't taste as good as it used to..maybe it was expired or something..so i just ate half of it and then i went to 710 to buy some of my textbooks...*i couldn't afford to buy all at once*. I went to Marilu's place right after that to give her the finance book and the calculator she wants to buy from me...*i need the money* . Since it was my first time to come by her place, and since they just moved in..so i stayed there..looked around and chatted for a while, paula was there too. Since i was planning to go to walmart first before i hit home so i asked them if they needed to buy something from walmart. And yes they did..they just moved in so they still have a lot of stuff to buy. The three of us then went to walmart together. There was a funny incident while we were there...since each of us had our particular stuff to buy, we went separate way...when marilu and i were done shopping and have checked out..we waited for Paula just near the optic. We waited there for quite a while but she still didn't showed up yet, so marilu went inside to look for her. Well..it's a big ass walmart we have here in carbondale so it's kinda hard to look for someone inside, pluait was crowded too. So Marilu came back to me with an empty hand. But then a second later, her cell phone was ringing. Turned out it was Paula calling from the payphone just a few steps from where we stood..haha..gimana sih..


At the time i got back from walmart, i still haven't eaten anything beside that bad-tasting fettucini..so i was hungry as hell. I just bought this other frozen fetuccini, but this one has grilled chicken on it..it looks good on the package. So i went to the kitchen and microwaved the thing....and when i tasted it..hmm..it taste okay, not as good as i expected though...and i definitely would not want to buy it again. Maybe today is just not my good day...i haven't got a decent meal for today and my stomach is growling. Oh..did i tell you that i went to the wrong classroom this afternoon?. yes it was rather embarassing at first but i was relieved that one one knew about that, except for the one girl whom i asked "is this b2b class?"..and she said "no, it's an antrophology class". Oh migawd..i got up and justify the classroom right away, huhh...no wonder i didn't notice any familiar faces in that class. So, i thought they changed the classroom or something so i went to rehn hall to check for it, turned out it wasn't at pullium hall, it was in quigly..i don't understand why in the world i wrote down pulliam in my notes where it was supposed to be quigly...oh well. So..yea it's true that today is not going my way.


Here goes another example..i didn't know that we need to sit at the exact spot we sat on monday..so everybody sat at the same place today as they were last monday and since i didn't come on monday, i could only choose the seat that was still available, and it wasn't very many of them since it's a crowded class. So the instructor just kinda pointed at one seat ..it 's in the 2nd row and in the middle of everybody. It's not my favorite spot at all, it's also very incovenient for me since i've never liked to be in the middle. Wherever i sit, be it in the car, in the classroom, in the airplane, in the theather or wherever..i always choose the one on the justify or right end..i don't like the idea of being in between. I don't know why...it's just me i guess..


After i got out of my communication class, i went to rehn hall to change the section...i wrote down section 001 on my registeration paper, and then as usual..that black guy processed my registeration through the computer and gave me the print version of my schedule and said that everything was taken care of. Taken care of my ass...because when i left rehn hall..i found out that he typed in 002 instead of 001, so that was not even the section i wanted to join..oh man i was so pissed at him, that new guy is soooo slooow like a snail, there was a long line at the registeration table and he still typed and moved in a slow motion...i just can't tolerate slow moving people. Not only he is slow, he can't even do his job. SO, because of his sluggishness, i had to go back in line and asked him to change that.


Poor me.. As if those i mentioned above is not enough to make my day miserable, because when i saw Donna on the way to the kitchen..i asked her about her business communication notes. She promised me that she will give all of her notes to me. And that will saves me a lot of trouble..since i am planning of skipping most of the classes...but..well oh well..maybe i just have to attend the class myself since she has thrown all of her notes away. Apparently she forgot that she promised to give them to me....


That's still not everything though. That's not all that irritates me today, there was something else. I was lying nicely on my bed...flipping through the channels looking for WSIU because i wanted to see the basketball game. But it seemed that i couldn't find the damn channel, isn't that strange?? I mean it's carbondale and it's an SIU town but how come ambassador hall doesn't have their one and only local channel??. argghh...


I guess that's all for now. I am munching on del monte golden sweet corn as i write this log entry...it's yummy though, the best thing i've had for today

I just got here this afternoon and when i stepped onto my room, all of a sudden i felt like i don't belong here. Well at least this is my last semester here..another 4 months and i'm outta here. My room was a messed, well it still messy now..but it's neater. I have cleaned almost everything in this room, i have reorganized my closet, my make-up corner...i threw away some make ups that i have never used or some which are already expired. I also reorganized my drawer and book shelves, put everything in the place where it belongs to and sorting which book or paper i still need and throw away the old and useless things that's been sitting there for months.


so my room is okay now although i haven't got a chance to vacuum the carpet, i guess i'll do that tomorrow. You know what, i was almost becoming the most miserable girl in the world today, but i got lucky so that probably makes me the most happiest one. It goes like this... i went to shnucks to deposit the check i got from first cellular, and right after that...i checked the balance at the ATM and i took some money out of that machine too. So when i got my money from that little machine...i walked away to my car..without feeling bad..without sensing that something might be wrong. I called Martha on the way to my car..asking her to join me to the dollar store..but she had a class to attend, so i went there all by my self. When i got there, i walked around..picked the things i needed to buy and went straight to the cashier. So..when i was taking the money from my wallet..i noticed that one credit card spot is empty...i was like...there is supposed to be a card in there..where is my atm card??..Oh my god, stupid me...i justify in it the machine..and it was still inside the machine with my pin number typed in already so people can just take some money from it. Oh there goes all of my money..... I was so panicked but trying hard to calm down..i was hoping that an honest person found my card and gave it back to the bank. damn... i'm short on money, and no one can take the only money i have for my survival..So i went back to the bank...and i talked to one of the teller about my situation and i haven't even finished explaining what happened and she suddenly.."oh..hold on a second". She looked in to a little drawer and guess what she took out of there..? Yes..it's my blue old national atm card..i was soo happy when i got it back...i have this big smile in my face as if i have just won a million dollar lottere or something...=)


710 was really crowded when i went there...well what do you expect..it's the second day of spring semester so everybody is buying their textbooks. I went there just to check the price, see if i can get it with the money i have right now..or else i will wait for the money from dad. oh speaking about money..and speaking about dad..it reminds me that i really really need to write the email i was talking about to my dad pretty soon.....i know tonite is impossible..so..maybe tomorrow.


Dendre and i watched the momento last night. Hmm, i have some comments regarding that movie but it's late now..and i am sleepy. So..tomorrow maybe? I am sleepy but i don't feel like sleeping..you know...not in this room, not in this tiny twin bed...and not without nduti by my side....huhu....=(

It's Friday Morning..i am so TGIF, i always loved weekend, and i still love it now even though everyday feels like weekends for me for these past 4 weeks, but the fact that dendre does not have to go to work is what makes it difference. And this weekend, we're going to Carbondale..hmm i can smell the House special chicken already, hehe..and we're going to see the salukis..they have been pretty good this season, i hope they can come out as a winner in the end..so at least there can be something that i can be proud of.

When in Famous Barr, i walked pass the watches section and i noticed that they still have the red nine west watch that i had been eyeing on. I called Nduti to ask for his opinion..whether i should buy the watch or not..of course he said that i don't need another watch, but i said i wanted it so bad...and then he said okay but not today, we can go back to famous barr tomorrow and he'll buy me the watch. Hehehe..=) The next day, i went back to the mall with him, when i tried the watch..it didn't look that good on my wrist, besides it needs to get another hole so it will fit perfectly and unfortunately they don't have the punch to make another hole. We almost went back with empty hands, but dendre noticed that i turned a bit sad by not buying the watch, hehe..so he gently took my hand and led me back to the counter..so were waiting patiently at the cashier to pay for the watch. But there was another customer who took forever. To kill the time, we were looking at another watches and i found this cute guess watch. It has the same red alligator texture genuine leather strap and a silver face. The face of this one is silver and kinda elongated square, whereas the one that i wanted to buy is more square and of course the Guess one is look fancier and it looks good on my wrist..and it just another ten bone...and dendre likes it a lot better. So..we decided to take the guess instead..=) and we (i obviously) went home with a happy face. I love you nduti...

So, the lesson that i can take from waiting so long at the cashier is...just be patient..because good things happen to those who wait patiently. Don't you agree?. Had i didn't wait patiently and just went to another cashier to pay for the watch..i wouldn't have the one that actually looks 100 times better than the one i intended to buy previously. Oh I am so happy...*smile*

I am finally able to drag my lazy hand to click the dreamweaver icon and start building the ISC website. Suprisingly, it didn't take me long to create the layout and everything..it's not finished yet, at least it's halfway done, and the most important thing is i know what layout to be used so i just need to mess with the contents tomorrow. I just need 2 or 3 hours the most to finish it. Apparently my sinusitis is not cured yet and i'm gasping for air right now..i feel like i couldn't breathe anymore...this is so scary. I took my medicine..and get my self a ricola candy *my fave*, hope those can make me feel better. Oh by the way, i did check the siue and maryville website, to get all of the information about their MBA programs. After a very careful thinking..i a, now 100% sure that i'll go for Maryville, John E. Simon Business School over edwardsville. Why?. Because i think it suits me better, i like their 8 weeks program and the fact that we only have class on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Mostly we even only have 2 days instead of 3..depends on the classes we're taking at the moment. Well, actually i don't like the fact that they only have night classes..*edwardsville is even worse by the way and ridicuolously it's on the weekends*. But hey maybe that's okay, once or twice a week wouldn't hurt me that bad, would it?

Hmm..don't know what to do?. I guess i'm bored..well no i am not, i just don't feel like doing things that i'm supposed to do. You know, school starts in a week and i still have a bunch of stuff that needs to be done. For example is building a simple webpage for storing my resume and personal info. Since i'll be graduating this may, it is very essential for me to get my resume ready...i need to start looking for a job or an internship soon...and of course to make me look professional and hi-tech, i need to have my resume online. It's not that i haven't started at all, i did...and it's halfway done but i'm way too lazy to click on the dreamweaver icon and work on it. Another stuff that i need to do is building ISC website..well it's actually not my job, it's dendre's but i understand that he's busy so i will take over the responsibility. Argus has asked me about the website since more than a month ago and i always promised him that it'll be done in a matter of few days. i haven't even started on it and i still have no idea about the layout. Other things that needs to be done in this winter holiday is looking for graduate school..well not exactly looking cause i have no other choice except siu edwardsville and marryville university, but at least i need to know and write down a lot of information that i need to know..what the requirements are, when are the deadlines, the tuition fee, the classes and everything.


See, i told you i have a lot of stuff to do, i still need to get the ASAF website done, it is actually done but it still need a finishing touch up here and there, and oh..how about klikmarketing website??..And also how about the letters for mom, dad and Hana..??. Man, up until now, i didn't realize how lazy i am, i mean i have absolutely nothing to do in the past 3 weeks and i'm all alone at home during the day, giving me a full internet/computer access to do all my things. But what have i done..??...yupe, exactly...nothing!!. Oh..i really really have to start working on my stuff tomorrow. I'll promise you, when i write an entry here tomorrow...i'll be like..oh i finally done with this and that..and bla bla bla....hehe

It's the second day of 2002...and i am still sick. I knew that i was gonna get sick when we were in Carbondale. I was surrounded by smokers for every minute i spent in there and that made me sick. In addition to that, the heater in my dorm was terrible, the hot air that comes out of that is just make you dry, totally uncomfortable. Anyway, we didn't do anything to celebrate new years. I was collapsed on the couch, i felt sick since i woke up but i didn't think it was gonna get any worse considering it's just a regular flu. So we went out looking for food, but the mc donalds was closed so we went to steak and shake, i was hoping i could get a beef and vegetable soup they have there to warm up my throats...but what happened was they were out of it. So i ordered another soup instead, it was chicken something. It tastes okay..except for the mexican rice that piles at the bottom of the bowl. The minute i finished my soup, i felt like a dizzyness hit my head right away, so we went to walgreens to get me some medicine.

Anyway, even though we didn't do anything special and despite all the miserable thing that happened to me...i'm glad with the fact that I was with my special person when the year changed *that made the moment special*, i'm also glad that we have spent another year together and i know that the next new year, the new year after that and another new year after that..i know that we will always spend it together...!.

I am very excited in approaching 2002, i know there will be wonderful things happened to me (at least if it's running according to my plan). I'll be an eligible bachelor in this may, i'll reach 23 *lagi lucu lucunya...* i hope my mom, hana, ibnu, emah and dad can fly here to attend my graduation. Also, i plan to get my MBA soon after that, get an internship, or a full time job..or whatever you know..i'm sure this year will be wonderful...amin. I actually still have a lot to talk about, but my mind is still not functioning well......maybe tomorrow?

..HaPpY NeW YeaR 2002 everybody.. Wishing you 12 months of happiness, 52 weeks of fun, 365 days of laughter, 8760 hours of good luck, 525600 minutes of joy, and 31536000 seconds of success . No time for sadness this year, not even for a single second. So be happy, be merry, and be thankful for everything

1. I love you for telling me that you love the way i look when i just get up in the morning

2. I love the fact that you don't hold grudges against me, you forgive and forget...and never bring up any mistakes i've made in the past

3. I love the way you carry yourself in front of anybody you meet, you seems to gain respect from others easily

4. I love the way you laugh when i childishly act silly in front of you, such as when i do the jungkir balik thing

5. I love the fact that you realize that I SUCK AT SINGING but you still ask me to sing anyway..

6. I love the fact that you pay attention to little things down to the very detail...like where i bought my clothes from even though i got it long ago and i've forgot about it my self, or when you know the price of 4 rolls charming tissues in schnucks and how expensive it is compare to walmart...

7. I love you for being my private buku pintar..*hehe*, i practically can ask you about anything and everything and you always have the answer for those..

8. I love the fact that you have a nurturing mental, the fact that you love kids, the fact that you are willing to grow plants and running around stores to find plants you like

9. I love you even more for the fact that the things i don't like about you can't even be accumulated to TEN....

10. I LOVE YOU for everything nduti, for being you, for loving me the way i am...thank you GOD for sending me this beautiful creature of human being..=)

You know..i went to Gordmans yesterday with nduti and i got my new organizer for 2002 *yey*, it's leather..well maybe vinyl but anyway, it's brown colored..i like it..it looks expensive, at first i wanted the red one so it matches my liz claiborne key hooks and i also plan to buy a red nine west watch..but oh well..the brown one looks better. So i'm happy i got what one...but to be honest here...i don't really know what to do with that, i haven't even unload it from the shopping bag. Oh well

Last week, i signed up for an online photo albums at fotki.com , i haven't fully figured it out how that site works but i uploaded some of my photos anyway, there were 4 of them. When i uploaded the photo..i remember i clicked the choice that said accessible for my friends only. That means i get to choose who can view my pictures and who can't..right??. So anyway, i haven't touched that thing again since last week and a few minutes ago..i wanted to upload some more pictures of mine when i noticed there is an entry in the guest book sections. Apparently, this dude name mahmud in egypt signed my guestbook, i don't even know him and have no idea how he get the access to my photo album, i found out later that his name is in my buddy list..don't ask me why his name is on the list..i haven't even put any of my friends on the list. Okay so


..to get my photo viewed by others that i don't know is one thing..i supposed i am okay with that since i also have a website with loads of pictures of me and i make it available for anyone to see...BUT..for a stranger to see my pictures and telling me how beautiful i look *honestly, it didn't flattered me at all* and steal my pictures and make it as his wallpaper is another thing...! This is really scares me and i don't know what to do..i want him to drag my pictures onto the recyble bin and just empty the bin...but how is that possible???.. Anyway, so what i did was i delete all of the pictures in my fotki album...oh man...this is so spooky...=(

Browsing around the net all day long, this what has been doing since i took my last final...not very productive. But hey, i don't have any choice. I enjoy this though because soon spring semester will start and i will barely have time to go online..so i'm making the most of it right now...hehe. Anyway, i'm still downloading songs..i can't get enough of those. My favorite song at the moment is kyle minogue.."can't get you out of my head"..i like the tunes and the rythme..it's so energetic and makes you happy and now i can't get this song out of my head..la la la..la la la la la la la...=)


You know, i checked my grades over the internet yesterday. When the semester began, i thought i could get this semesters done with A's all over my transcript but i kinda figured out that was not gonna happen when the final's week approaching..kinda lost track i guess. So, i only found 3 A's on my transcript..suprise surprise..i got A for my marketing research class...did he get my grades mixed up or something?. or was the project really a masterpiece?. I guess it's the project huh?..so all of the hard work, the time that wasted to get this boring project completed is finally paid off. I got B for two of the classesand a C for finance class. I know this finance class is no joke and when i came to the class on day one i was like.."i'll be happy with a c for this class"..but then i made my effort, i got a b on my second exam and i got A's and B's for my quizzes, eventhough i haven't found out what my final grades is...i'm sure it won't be that bad, at least a B..so how come i got C for the overall grades???..Oh i need to talk to the teacher..but ooh..you know him, he's not friendly and seems to not have the willingness to help the students...and he made it clear on the last class that he can't give grades over the phone or email..so that means i need to get my butt all the way back to carbondale just to find out what my grades are/


we're going to Gordmans later this afternoon, after dendre got back from work..i'm so excited because i'm gonna buy my new organizer. I know i know..i have this thing about organizer..i just can't get enough of those..i remember ever since i was in grade school..i always bought organizer over and over and over again, i must have one big box of those accumulated. And you know..it's not like i'm this creative girl who seems like running out of places to allocate her so called creativeness..believe me i am not. So i just bought one for the sake of it and since new year is coming..i have a good reason to buy yet another new organizer..and the rosetti organizer sitting nicely on the rack at gordmans is just so iressistible..


So..i finished my first cd yesterday..*sounding like an artist..*...it has alternative rock songs on it...from blurry to creed ..the calling to staind, matchbox 20, linkin park, five for fighting. My favorite song in this one is superman.."it's not easy...to be..me...". I like puddly of Mud by blurry too...i basically like every single song in this cd. Now i'm about to make my second cd, i'm gonna put every love songs by krisdayanti and Anang *haha, it's so cheesy don't you think?*...