HANZKY

One of my new year resolutions is to get fit, toned and live a healthier lifestyle. Of course I fail. I did the first attempt of trying to be healthier, that was to get my general health check up. Surprisingly I turned out to be healthy...and then after that I forgot all about the plan. In total, I stepped on the treadmill about three times for the last 6 months :(. My weight skyrocketed! I gained about 5 kilos :((. I definitely look chubbier and if I met relatives, they would ask the same thing, "Lagi isi ya Han?". My clothes don't fit me anymore, and I have a lot of clothes but nothing seem to fit just right. I'm tired of spending money and getting new clothes :((. I knew I had to do something but laziness took the best of me :(.

This morning, Mommies Daily published an article about Keluarga Nugraha, who are a household name for mommies bloggers as Astri, the mom is always been sort of an inspiration for all mommies. I took a peek to her blog and learned that she is on a mission to have a smaller waist and belly line. I mean, if you look at her, most women would kill to have a body like her yet she is still very determined to have a fat free figure. Despite living with 4 kids in Australia with no help of nanny, running a very busy, one women show catering business, some design projects, a garden to attend and gazillion activities, she still manages to spare 30 minutes every single day to step on the treadmill. It's a hard slap on my face that I always have 'How could I find the time to do it' excuse to justify my laziness. I guess I just didn't want it bad enough :(. If I wanted it that bad, I would find a way.

...what causes people to feed into their ego? Is it that gratifying to always be at the mercy of others' praise and admiration?

Or are they actually insecure that they need those as validation of their self worth?

And Twitter seems to be just the place for people wear their pride on their sleeves, people who would easily succumb into their ego faster than you can say RETWEEET!

Already? That means we're moving into the second half of the year next week? Wheww..where did all those time go? I don't even dare to look up to my 2011 resolution right now, afraid there's too many lists I haven't crossed :(.

'Summer' break is here. The kids are out of school and Jibran is enjoying his soccer camp. Jibran and Jehan are supposed to fly out to Solo on Monday morning...but there could be a slight change and I might go with them for the whole week. I have a few hours to decide.

Btw the layout is new :) and I like this one a lot. Changing the blog template reminds me about my college days where I could just spend the whole day trying to figure out the HTML code.

Workload is getting better, I'm still learning on not spreading myself too thin, because I don't want to experience the level of stress that hit me last month. I ended up eating too much and worried that I would never get everything done. I blamed myself for not being able to be there for the kids and cook healthy food for my husband. I had digestive problem and couldn't even stand a cup of coffee because it made me nauseated and gassy. My stomach tightened every time someone reminded me about work deadlines and I couldn't sleep properly, and I didn't even drink coffee!. I think that was the first time I experience what is called: stress. Of course, I shed a few tears too when it was dark and quiet. The moment where I miss my simple life back in St. Louis :'(

But I'm getting there, trying to sort out my priorities and try to live in the moment. I've touched base with the SLR camera and started taking pictures. I've splurged on an L lense and don't regret it all. It captures the moments I want to hold dear in my heart perfectly.

So what do I look forward to for the next month? Hopefully we can manage a short getaway because we desperately need a vacation. Oki is moving to a new company next month, totally unplanned and unexpected as he has everything going on at KG, but it's an opportunity he can't say no. What I love the most about this new company is the fact that it's located not too far for home and hopefully no more going home at 9 :). So that's why we need to squeeze time for a getaway before he starts his new journey because as a new employee, he needs to wait after six months to claim his leave.

I guess that's it for now. Tomorrow is Jibran end of year performance and we need to be there at 7 AM!!...ZzzzZzzz

*this was written on Sunday June 12 2011



I hope you had a good day today Jib. You've started off the day off with swimming (or more like splashing) at the insulated pool with Jehan and Nadira and ate fried rice for brunch at the backyard. Later on in the afternoon, we went to Pondok Indah Mall to get you the duck feet swim fins and to buy a few t-shirts for Jehan as she has outgrown most of her clothes. You wondered why Jehan clothes always become too small. I told you it's because at her age, Jehan is growing rapidly, just like you when you were her age.

Today is Oki's 32nd bday, too bad he has an office outing somewhere in south of Bogor so we couldn't celebrate it with a dinner or something. But I managed to surprise him with a present. The kids didn't have school today so we lingered around in bed after we woke up. Oki had to go to work so he took a shower, and that's when I prepared the bday present (as in wrapping it nicely, etc). Then when he was about to step out of the bathroom, the kids were already waiting in front of the door, holding the present and singing happy birthday :)).

After that, we went downstairs to have regular breakfast and went about our daily activities.

So happy birthday nduutt....hopefully when the kids think about integrity, honesty and dignity, they'll think of you :). I love you to the moon and back!!

Despite being the first day of my period. In the end, I feel that today is a good day. I now feel relax and content. Today's formula of a good day is:
- I had time with my kids where I wasn't in a hurry or had to check my phone every now and then
- I had eye to eye conversation with them and listened to their story
- I cooked a meal for Oki
- I had dinner together with the kids
- Jehan, the relatively picky eater tried new food!. She ate a lot since I got home at 5: 30. A small chunk of banana bread I made last night, lots of mangoes, rice & chicken curry (most of the sauce was washed away first since it was kinda spicy), and she tried a piece of tofu I made for Oki and finished off with cup of chocolate milk.
- Jibran started to write in his little journal and we read together.
- Jehan read me her favorite Dora goes to the doctor story for 5 minutes. It was the cutest thing. I recorded it but she pressed the delete button accidentally. I was actually planning to let the girls at the office listen to it tomorrow *emang orang tua nggak boleh pamerin anaknya :D*
- Before she dozed off, she asked for a hug a few times and felt asleep in my arms :')




So in the end, it's all about whether I was there for my family or not and as long as I'm making memories with them, all is well with the world.

First day of period today so yea I was a bit cranky. In fact, I've been pretty cranky for the last two weeks. Something is definitely wrong with my stomach as I could feel nothing but gas!. Pair it with the flu that I've just been infected since Monday. I feel worse that I've ever felt in a long time :(. I haven't been very productive as I would like in the work department too. and the workload has been crazy. I'm overseeing a few projects that I have very little controls of, so it's stressing me out :(. In fact, I'm suspicious that it's actually stress that contributes to my stomach problem.

So I decided to leave the office at 4:30 today. I missed the kids. I missed being at home when the sun is still up. I missed lounging around the house and taking pictures of the kids. That's why I took the camera home with me, hoping to chase the light so I could take nice pictures.. But I had to stop at the grocery store first and came home before dusk, just in time to see this

I hated the transparent glass on my pantry cabinet because everyone can see the mess inside. It stores everything from empty containers, cereal boxes, ketchup and everything else. I've been planning to change the glass or put stickers on it but couldn't get myself around it somehow. One day I had a brilliant idea to get everything out and put other stuff that'll at least look more organized. So now this mess has turned into...

...an outgrowth of articulating your values and living them - Psychology Today

I know I haven't been taking care of myself as religiously I should have been. The culprit is what else other than time?. If I could have it my way, I will regularly visit beauty salon to receive my facial or microdermabrasion or have my skin checked and treated at the dermatologist. But I don't have an hour to spend on waiting in line at the dermatologist waiting room, two hours to spend on the road and half hour to spend inside the dermatologist office. Oh, plus another 15 minutes or so to wait for the prescription. Almost four hours? Thanks but no thanks!


That's why I was delighted when I learned about Artistry 8 minutes beauty.I love anything that takes less than ten minutes to do or anything with three-in-one formula along with reversible jacket and multifunction cardigan *lho, jadi panjang :p*. Anyway,

Kalau ada cerita seperti ini..

Ehh..si A kan kemaren ulang tahun ..trus dia dikasih jam Rolex lho sama
sahabatnya

Reaksi kebanyakan orang mungkin."Oh yaa..enak banget sih, gue mau dong jadi temen sahabatnya"

Yes, wishing that we would be that A person, wishing to be on the receiving end while instead we should be wishing we were the best friend, who is on the giving end (and probably more financially secure that she can afford the nice watch for a present).

To give, no matter how we look at it, is always better than to receive.

And why would we want to be the one who receive while we can be the one who share happiness and who give other people something they would treasure forever?

Last Thursday morning, I found a series of pictures showing people pray in the most extreme places such as in a war zone, in the streets filled with snow, in the jungle somewhere, in between the building construction and other places that we don't normally go, let alone pray in there. Of course that kind of put me to shame because there are times when I missed my prayer, even when I was in my most comfiest zone :(.

Here's the Big Ben, not far from Westminster Abbey. (I know I should've posted the one in Buckingham Palace instead).